Filthdelphia 5, Braves 3

-Buddy Carlyle was average, but if his defense would have helped out, who knows what would have happened. Jeff Francoeur picked up a few outfield assists, but the middle infield of Mr. Dynamic and Martin Prado did little to help out. In the first, McCann tried to throw out Prado, but his throw was low and Prado didn't keep it front of him. Escobar followed by not backing up the play and a ball that trickled away only 10 feet allowed Rollins to third.

-Carlyle walked the bases loaded before getting a K. Jayson Werth singled to right, however, and that brought in Rollins, but for some dumbass reason, they sent Pat Burrell. Joe Morgan said Burrell could run so maybe they heard that and thought with the count full and the runners running with the pitch, Burrell could score on Francoeur's arm. Talk about running into an easy out. Burrell never even touched homeplate after being stopped a half-foot short by McCann.

-In the fifth, they tested Francoeur again and this time, it was Werth who was Werthless (thank you). Werth literally scoots around home plate and McCann's tag only to get into a stare down before being tagged out. The throw was to the first base side of homeplate, but Werth was dead meat at the plate.

-However, the middle infield defense went to work, unfortunately, and after a Rollins walk, Prado got a high bouncer that he refused to go back on, nor charge. He kind of let it come to him and it played an odd bounce. He tossed the ball to Mr. Dynamic, who dragged his foot across second and went on to first for a double play. Oh, wait, that's what should have happened. Instead, he missed second completely and then couldn't get the runner. Frankly, the double play was probably not possible, but they didn't get an out and Ryan Howard hit a three run bomb one out later.

-Yatesy was solid, but after the Braves got a run to cut the two-run hole in half, Aussie allowed a triple to Rollins and he scored on a sacfly by Burrell. Francoeur air-mailed the throw home, but he had no chance anyway.

-The third run I just mentioned was insane in how ESPN handled it. Still slurping on Bonds's knob, the network reaired the Henry Aaron held-at-gunpoint speech that originally played, as ESPN pointed out, on August 7th (bastards tried to ruin my birthday). While they did this, Martin Prado doubled in McCann. Unbeknowist to these jackasses at ESPN because they were too busy playing homage to their controversial God. Bastards.

-Chipper picked up the other two RBI's with a double. Prado was in because he was 4 for 9 off the soft-tossing Jamie Moyer, as reported by Mark Bowman. Being that Bowman's basically Bobby Cox's alter ego, it was clear Prado would start ahead of KJ.

-Mets won, Padres won, Senators won, and the Beaneaters got a win. Bad day for a Braves loss. Off day tomorrow and then...BARRY BONDS~!

-Ah, dammit.